Ramblings and Musings of the Insane, Philosophical Ladybug

And so after a month we come full-circle. I went to F.Y.E. at the end of January looking for some type of James Bond figure in Roger's image. That wasn't the only reason I was there, and I would have likely gone anyway even if it hadn't been a reason at all, but I was still very upset when I got sick after that excursion and got everybody else in the house sick. I can't prove it came from there, but it must have been either there or Wal-Mart, since I got sick before anybody else and therefore most likely did not pick it up at my aunt's. It had to be a place where I was the only one going around and coming into contact with people. But it was highly aggravating and upsetting that it happened, especially when the shopping was fruitless.

I was upset for weeks feeling like I should have gone to Build-a-Bear instead and got the other doll I wanted. Then I probably wouldn't have got sick/got everybody sick. And I was frustrated that I didn't get to go last week because of the lingering cough problems. Now, however, I'm grateful I didn't make it. Hopefully I'll get another chance for the doll, but meanwhile ...

I finally found a figure online for a decent price. Not one of the 12-inch figures, sadly, but about half that size. I spent days debating whether to get it and trying to see if it really looked enough like Roger to make a purchase worth it. There were four people watching it besides me; it was a Buy It Now listing. I felt a little bad to suddenly pull it out from underneath them, but any of them could have bought it at any time if they had felt so inclined, and apparently they didn't by the time I made up my mind, so no regrets. These figures usually seem to go for much more than I got mine for, so I'm doubly thrilled.

I did immediately feel guilty to purchase something James Bond, since neither Dad nor Mom like that franchise (and I'd be all over it if it wasn't for the bed times; I loved Moonraker except for what amounted to two minutes or less of bed times/implications of bed times ... and I still kind of want to see more films, too ...), but of course it was more for the actor than the character, and my idea was that it could be whatever character I wanted it to be at any given time. I stayed in that more excited mindset and didn't feel any more guilt.

Ohmygoshsquee, it shipped Monday and came this past day! And, as I determined before taking the plunge and purchasing, it does look sufficiently like Roger to be worth it! And it's so nice with fabric clothing.... I adore fabric clothing! It shows real thought and attention went into the crafting, instead of just putting molded clothes on. (Not that some molded clothing can't be amazingly detailed too, of course. But it upsets me that fabric clothing is not really a thing like it used to be.) The card is also very nice, with many pictures of Roger all over it. I have it sitting next to the card from my Oscar Goldman figure so I can see the pictures. The figures themselves are on my desk.

So I have what I set out to find a month ago and I am very pleased.

I've also been reading that Saint book I got with my last Amazon order. I've got to say, I like this one way more than that short story collection I tried a couple of years ago. Even though that was written after this novel, I like Simon's characterization in the novel far more. It's one of the books written around the WWII era, The Saint Sees It Through, and Simon is serious like his television counterpart. I haven't seen one aggravating, dirty-minded crack in here like there was in the short story collection. I also haven't seen any instances of Simon taking the law into his hands more than I find comfortable (no burying bodies in gardens to keep the people involved from going to jail, oy vey). I may want to try some other books from this time period. And if I like them too, I will be highly amused, as of course the WWII era books are largely hated among the book purists. They usually prefer their Saint much more playful and mischievous and naughty, as he is in the earlier books. I prefer him more like the character in the TV show. Which of course immediately makes me a bizarre wild card in the fandom, as I am almost everywhere. Can't break with tradition, after all.

I'm also writing a sci-fi Maverick fic, as of course the fic where Snakes reveals himself to be alive has to include some sci-fi elements. And with encouragement, I'm continuing it to show Snakes taking Beau through the portal to visit the present-day. It's mostly a character study, though, as both Snakes and Beau have issues to work through at this point. It probably won't be more than a two-shot, but who knows.

I am vaguely considering that maybe Beau could be visiting in the Count Manzeppi fic I wanted to write, and that might give me a little more motivation to go ahead with it, but I'm not sure. I was just burned so seriously with The Deadly Codename that I'm honestly afraid to start a new WWW fic. I don't want to be involved in any more drama in that fandom. Beau around would just be one more thing for that person to complain about, should he decide to complain again. I might actually have more luck writing that fic for the Maverick fandom instead. **headdesk.**

In any case, there is the problem that by playing so much in Snakes' past, it kind of turned a few things in my original timeline for him on their heads, as I knew would happen if I kept playing. But I really liked the things I was coming up with and didn't want to let them go. Now I do have to wonder how to re-align things again, since Snakes wasn't supposed to have any friends before going to the present-day and now with the Maverick branch of the timeline he has Beau. I'm trying to rationalize it by him saying that Pinto broke him so much over three years of torture that he wasn't sure Beau really would still care and want to be his friend, since they didn't even really know each other that well. But I'm not sure that's a good enough fix.

There's also the issue that in Airship it's a plot point that Snakes hasn't been back to the past before and goes back only to find Jim and Arte. After I brought in the idea of Snakes and Beau, I knew Snakes wouldn't want to leave Beau hanging, so in the Maverick timeline, the first time he goes back is to find Beau and let him know he's okay. I don't know whether to leave things as they are, apparently two similar but different timelines, to try to reconnect them by explanations from Snakes, or to reconnect them by tweaking some things in the older stories.

Another idea I had was that maybe the time re-set Duke caused in the YGO branch of the timeline screwed a few things up that he hadn't intended on, including Snakes and Beau, and that perhaps when it's said that Snakes didn't have anyone, that's because he doesn't remember Beau with the time re-set. That gets fixed at the end of the story, so if there was any trouble, Snakes remembers the truth now. But that gets sticky too, as it would mean that the original WWW time-travel fics were written with the time re-set in mind and they're Snakes' incorrect memories of how things happened.

Confusion, thy name is time-travel. Confusion, thy name is also retcon.

I've gotta say, I have to sympathize with George Lucas in a situation like this. When you start playing in the past, you find new ways of telling things that you like better than the original way. And then naturally you want to tweak the originals to fit the new ideas. But that's an unpopular thing to do. And I still don't agree with him booting out the original actors for Boba Fett and Anakin Skywalker in the original trilogy DVDs. But still, I can understand why it happened.

What am I gonna do?

This has been a long week of pain, merchandising dilemmas, and mice.

For almost two years, as I've recorded here off and on, I've been trying to find a Belle doll with removable clothing. I don't know why it's so hard to find her that way when some of the other Disney girls are fairly accessible with more than partially molded clothing. I usually only see Belle with removable clothes in expensive sets. There was one with another girl for $25, and that wasn't too bad for two, so I considered that, but then Wal-Mart stopped selling it before too long. Sigh.

A couple weeks ago, when they got in their new Fall stuff, I actually saw a Belle with removable clothes that was an acceptable price! She's part of a new line, I guess. I struggled with wanting to buy her right then, but my plan was to buy her on my shopping spree on my birthday next month, so I didn't. But then I had a random Once dream on Tuesday and woke up worrying that maybe they'd sell out of her by next month and I wouldn't be able to find her, etc. And I decided to get her that day when we needed to go get some stuff for mouse battle.

Crystal suggested maybe I could refrain from de-boxing her until my birthday, since my original intention had been to get her as a birthday present to myself. I decided maybe I would try that. Then I got her home and kind of wanted to de-box, but I ended up in so much pain almost immediately that I decided not to do anything until that was over. I make a big deal out of de-boxing and love to do it when I can really enjoy it.

So all this week I've gone back and forth on should I or shouldn't I. There's always other things to get on the shopping spree; typically I like to get several things. I don't know how much money I'll be able to gather by then, though, since finding stuff I can write has been slow and I'm still paying off some money I owe my church. And I don't know whether I'll be able to do the shopping spree right on my birthday, since it falls on a Saturday this year and that generally isn't a good day for us to go out. So I thought it would be nice to have Belle here to enjoy de-boxing then, especially if I couldn't get out right on that day.

(I'm also debating whether to do the shopping spree before or after my birthday. Usually if we can't make it on the actual day we do it after, but I don't know if I feel like waiting the whole weekend to do it Monday or Tuesday, so we might do it Friday. Still thinking about that. There's also the high probability that I might be cramping on both Friday and Saturday. Ugh.)

I lean more towards trying to hold out and save her for my birthday, but I don't know if that will work in the long run. Today, when I heard that another mouse was loose in the basement stealing bait, in addition to Mom and Dad hearing weird noises in the living room and not being sure whether it was the mouse in Dad's room with the sound carrying through the wall or whether it was a new living room mouse, my willpower just about broke.

It was such a beautiful day when I got Belle on Tuesday evening; it was September 1st, and since I celebrate meteorological seasons, that was my first day of Fall. I saw leaves all over the ground at the cemetery. It was beautiful. And even though nothing has really changed regarding our problems, it felt so liberating to finally have summer behind us. I want to keep hoping that Fall will be better, even though the logical part of me strongly doubts it.

I did finally solve my Amazon problem; I got Octavia, Vega$, and both season 3 Perry sets, as the prices were way down. I only had to pay $4 in cash after the gift cards paid the rest. The package came yesterday and it was wonderful. It was a little like a mini-birthday, getting all of that. It was a mini-respite from all the horrible things happening in our house right now.

Christopher does have some more screentime in his Vega$ episode than in what I saw on YouTube! I was absolutely thrilled! I must take pictures from that soon; he just looked gorgeous. I swear, he grew more and more handsome the older he got. And his hair! Ohmygosh, that beautiful, thick, fluffy, curling at the ends hair....

I really like that show in general, too; the main character seems to have very high morals and it's just very nice and refreshing to watch. I'm anxious to see the other episodes on the set. I introduced Mom to the show via Joseph's episode last night and she liked it too. And Greg Morris is the police lieutenant in it! I love the friendship between his character and the main character.

And it was so exciting to finally have Octavia! The doll Octavia is with my DJ doll, of course; I love the fanon concept that they are friends in an Odd Couple way, and that's become canon recently. The Pony Octavia is with Sunset Shimmer and some other Pony girls. I need to get the Pony DJ now to go with her. I also have Funrise plushies of them both. Build-a-Bear is making a DJ plushie that will come out this month, and I might buy her, but I hope they'd make Octavia too.

(Ugh, I was looking so forward to Build-a-Bear's Ditzy/Derpy/Bubblecup/Muffins plushie, and now they just make her an online exclusive and randomly up her price by $5 more, for no apparent reason. I am so bummed. I might try to get her anyway, because I really wanted that one. DJ will be in stores, so I'll be able to see her in person before buying. I'm not as sure I'll get her, since I have Funrises of both her and Octavia and I don't know if Build-a-Bear will make Octavia, but DJ has one of my most favorite color schemes ever, white and blue, so I might get her regardless. And I love that Build-a-Bear made a unique, original cape just for her, even though I probably won't buy that.)

I'm thrilled to have season 3 of Perry now, too. There's so many of those I haven't seen uncut before, and the ones I have seen uncut I wanted to own. There's lots of Sergeant Brice in season 3; I remember several episodes where Lieutenant Tragg is teaching him things about investigating. I'm anxious to see those again. Sergeant Brice is adorable!

I finally started writing the necklace Perry story, too. It's going to have the Decadent Dean characters in it and the masquerade ball and Tobin Wade laying low but trying to do what he can to help. I do not excuse the character's action in the episode at all; I think he was probably the biggest slimeball in the series. Or one of the top five, at least. But I have always been curious as to whether he might regret what he did to his friends, since it was heavily implied that he was once a genuine friend. Hence how that LJ blurb happened years ago and why my story is going to feature him now. I hope no one will think I'm trying to excuse him when all I'm trying to do is explore a possibility. And when the story will feature themes of repentance and restitution. I don't know that I will have him and Aaron Stuart being able to fully mend things, though. The LJ blurb is more that way because it was self-indulgent, as many LJ-only things I write are, but I am totally skeptical that they could ever have a friendship again after what Tobin did. I guess I'll see how I feel after I've written the story out. While I usually only have a overarching outline for a story in my mind, I generally do try to plan each chapter in detail as I come to it. I think I know what will be in chapter 3 now, so maybe I'll start writing it soon.

Also, today I had another of those "wandering around a place trying to avoid being found, but in a low-key, no danger way" dreams. Those kind seem to often take place at the church, for some reason. This one did, too. I was trying to avoid being found by some dream "friends" whom I didn't really think of as friends. I wandered through empty classrooms, paused to watch a performance on the stage and try to sneak a few chips from the snack table, and then randomly wandered down to the basement and into a cold room? I was almost caught in the cold room and it turned into a sort of hide-and-seek. I think dreams like that are manifestations of my repressed loves of exploring houses and buildings and playfully hiding from people. That was followed up by another Once dream. I barely think about the show in reality these days, but it keeps entering my dreams. I wonder if I'm going to keep dreaming about it with increasing frequency as long as I'm trying to resist de-boxing Belle before my birthday....

Speaking of Once, though, I also noticed a new line of Disney Prince dolls. I'm kind of excited hoping Prince Adam will be in the line and I can get him and maybe figure out how to touch him up a bit to look like Mr. Gold/Rumpelstiltskin.

It ended up being a really nice day after all. Dad was able to find the things I'd asked for, so I got those and some nice surprises, such as a leaf necklace from an aunt. Crystal wrote me a lovely fic and JP's present and card came in time for the day. I received lots of well wishes from people online. And there are other things in the mail now that should come next week, so I have those to look forward to.

I ended up really feeling that the illness had passed and I was just left with post-nasal drip and this blasted lingering cough, so we went out. We didn't make it everywhere I had planned, but I trimmed the list way down and we made it everywhere I especially wanted to go (except we forgot to look in the Halloween store in the second mall, sigh).

Target has apparently eliminated their classic TV shows almost entirely. They used to be the go-to store for cheap Universal releases, but not anymore. Sigh. I was hoping to find some Kojak DVDs. I miss it being on MeTV regularly and the prices are too high at the moment.

But I had a fun time and was thrilled to find that F.Y.E. carries some of the new Sailor Moon plushies by Great Eastern. I'd been debating getting the Chibi Moon one for a while, but I was hoping to see her in person first, and then when I actually saw her in person, and at the same approximate price as Amazon's, I couldn't resist. I seriously adore Chibi Moon and am thrilled to finally have a plushie of her (although I hope in the future to be able to find a bigger one, too).

Then I found a Pony hat at Wal-Mart and decided to get it. I'd already tried to get it at the local Wal-Mart and didn't because it ended up being dirty. Blech. But this one was nice and clean. I can never find a Pony shirt that I can actually fit into, with decent-length sleeves, that doesn't cost an arm and a leg, and the hat was the same price as the character shirts I usually buy, so it seemed like a good trade. I did see a shirt at Target I might have been able to wear, but it cost $9.99 and that was more than I wanted to pay when it only had one of my special favorites and two others that I don't like as much.

I really don't understand why it seems like girls' shirts always have tiny sleeves these days. It's so annoying! They should have different styles so that everyone can get what they want. The $9.99 one at Target had long sleeves. Maybe if it goes on Clearance later, I'll think about buying it. Another thing I don't like, though, is how thin these shirts tend to be. Shirts in the boys' department have both longer sleeves on the short-sleeve shirts (to the elbow, like they should be) and are generally thicker.

We also went in the Hallmark store and had fun looking at things in there, and the lady knew about Mannix, so we all had a fun little conversation.

One thing I'm a little sad about, though, is that it looks like the lovely store that made custom shirts has closed up. I was actually surprised when they were still there last year. And then it was just in July when I had them make up a shirt with Joe Mannix and Lew Wickersham. But by then, they had a new process and the price had shot way, way up. I had to pay about $24 for the shirt, compared to $14.95 plus tax for the other two! They said the other process was better and made the shirts last longer, but honestly, if you take good care of them, like I do, they last fine with the old process. I think they should have kept both processes and let people pick what they wanted for the price they could afford. I have this feeling that people just couldn't take the more expensive prices and that's why the place folded. Sad.

... Although I also considered maybe they just moved, and after performing a Google search, it looks like they may have done that. I'm getting a listing that's actually closer to me. Yay! I'll have to investigate. I still kind of wanted a shirt with Ginger and Lou, too, although it will probably have to be the last one if I do it.

So yes, the outing was lots of fun. But I was honestly surprised to discover that our local Wal-Mart has the best Halloween selection over the one in the bigger city! Now we need to go to the local Wal-Mart so I can show Mom all the cute decorations, like the knick-knack Halloween shops and eateries and such.

Yesterday was a very long day, filled with things such as more insomnia and an insistent allergy attack/cold (all of which overstayed their unwelcome through today). -.- But I did get plunnied for the blurb below. X3

And I saw some adorable geese swimming (and honking)! ^O^ I love waterfowl; I think they and chickens are probably my favorite birds. And peafowl. **so amused thinking of that peacock walking around the zoo.**

This blurb is for the third Southwest/West fic. X3


( Private Property )

I hate nausea. I absolutely hate it. I had a mild spell of it early in the day, but then it left after I took a nap before we left to investigate lots and such. It came back after we returned, and it came back with a vengeance. Lovely. So I dozed for a bit and it went away again, at least enough that I didn't feel so sickly. It hovered in the background while I ate an apple and then came downstairs, and now it finally seems to be receeding.

While we were out, I decided to use a coupon I'd acquired for Borders when I'd made my previous purchase there. The Borders in Provo stays open till eleven, which is great because we didn't get there till ten-thirty, after all was said and done. **envious.** Ours closes at nine. -__-; Anyway, I bought two volumes of YGO manga: five and six of Duelist Kingdom. Lots of Seto! Those volumes include his rooftop duel with Yugi and Seto's duel with Pegasus. Of course, they're slightly different from the anime, but I love them anyway. ^^ It feels good to reminisce about some of the most intense moments of Duelist Kingdom. Those episodes with Seto were among the first I ever recorded.

I was also rewatching the first two Grand Prix episodes the other day, and I noticed something. When Siegfried clicks the mouse button, he clicks the right one instead of the left one. Therefore, he must be either ambidextrous or left-handed.

I've always been known for noticing little things like that in shows. XD;

**pets the icon.** That song just goes with Doom arc Dartz so well! I wanted that exact screengrab to make the icon, so I was glad that yugioh.de had it. ^^

And now for a blurb. XD Here we have one for a future scene in Life After the Tears, with a meeting of three YGO businessmen. Dartz would be there, only he has other things to tend to at the moment, and he's not established as the CEO of Paradius again, at this point. First he has to get the company away from Doom Reborn. X3 Anyway . . .


( Meeting of Doom )

Oy. . . . For the last few days I've felt like maybe I had a sore throat coming on, but nothing developed. Now I thought maybe it was going into the second stage of a cold, which is sniffling and such. But I have a constant urge to sneeze. ><; I think maybe it's either hay fever or an allergy instead, because I don't feel the least bit sick. And also because I didn't get congested after eating cheese last night. **laugh.**

I got chapter 6 of The Darkness Within written. ^__^ Honestly, I love how it's coming out! I suppose after they rescue Hilda, I'll do a bit of a time jump to a couple of weeks later..... And then I think I'll insert some form of the shower scene. XD;

I also did two different RP versions of my bizarre blurb (well, one version isn't finished yet). That was cool. X3 I wasn't planning to put the blurb in a fic, nor to turn it into one of its own, but who knows what the future might bring.

XD; Bananas that are not ripe do not seem to do much for cramping. **hits head on desk.** Ugh. . . .

I finally got the Tokyo Mew Mew episodes to work! (I found that they played fine if I didn't go to Full Screen. XD; I had to squint to read the subtitles occasionally, but mostly they were clear enough to be seen.) I downloaded 12 (which was the episode Fox Box started with, strangely) and then 1. They were both awesome, and much better in the Japanese! The dub cut out and added so much stuff that wasn't necessary. XD; The romance isn't overkill in the original; it's just cute. I can tell I'm going to really enjoy this show. ^^

Random tidbit: Mollie Weaver plays Reneé (Zakura) in the dub. I like Mollie. ^^ I found her website earlier. She's a singer with a four-octave range and a really pretty voice. For some reason she keeps reminding me of Sarah McLachlan and I don't know why. XD; She doesn't really look like Sarah. Maybe it's the voice.

And I need to write this idea down before I forget it. When I was dozing off, I had a plot bunny for Valon to almost drown and then be ill (probably with delirium) and for Alister and Raphael to be trying to nurse him back to health. ^^; True, it's a plot I have used similarly before, but the bikers can make everything seem new. **smiles.**

Yesterday morning I had fun making a biker quiz. Unfortunately, CompuServe didn't send people's results to me. XD; So . . . anyone who took the quiz and whom I haven't talked to yet about it, mind telling me how you did? ^^; **is considering making another one and using her Hotmail address, since it's working again.**

Isn't my icon purty? **smiles.** It is my Christmas present from SK. ^___^ I love it!

I'm almost over my cough! And I can kinda tell when the sickness has passed enough so that I can leave the house without fear of a setback. XD So we went Christmas shopping yesterday! I gave myself a Christmas present: The YGO Movie Ani-Manga. Purty color pictures! **pats them.** And I had a flash of deja vu right in the mall of looking at the purty color pictures. XD; Weirdness. I also got presents for three other people and now know what my dad wants. So I am triumphant!

I've been working on my Ghosts in the Night fic. The extended flashback has become a double flashback. XD; Scenario One follows Alister and Scenario Two follows Valon and Raphael. I'm using two different songs. ^__^ For Alister, it's Peter Gabriel's I Don't Remember. For Valon and Raphael, it's Hello by Evanescence. I wanted to use Hello with my first biker fic, but it didn't fit. XD; So I just used the last line as the title. But Hello fits perfectly with this new fic, especially considering Valon's initial reaction to the news of Alister's demise. I want to finish this fic by Christmas. I should be working on Crimes for Christmas, but I really wanna do this biker fic instead. XD; And ohmygosh. Next Friday is Christmas Eve! @@

I have just discovered that some people still honestly believe Alister (or Amelda) is a girl and that the dubbers screwed up again! O__O This is highly appalling to me. XD; Next they'll be saying Marik is really a girl. But no, they won't, because there's obvious proof otherwise: he's taken his shirt off! But Alister's shirt is practically painted on his body! And he doesn't have the chest of a female! Anime women don't have flat chests like that unless they're children. And since when do anime women have muscles and get voiced by men? XD; Women can voiceact as male characters, but I've never heard of things going the opposite way, especially in anime. Alister is voiced by a guy, even in Japan. The dub did not screw up. Case closed. XD;

My sore throat decided to become some form of laryngitis on Wednesday. o__o; That was freaking weird. I didn't get any sleep then because it was keeping me awake. I finally slept for a few hours in the late afternoon into the evening. I am so glad it's gone now. Maybe things can go back to being just a normal cold now. XD;

And I'm proofreading my biker fic! **strokes it.** I'm so proud of this thing! It goes up in a few minutes.

I found the Sonic Adventure 2 soundtrack. Circuit City still had that copy I've seen there a couple of times before! I also got a Gundam W DVD from Media Play. They're only charging $12.59 for most (if not all) the volumes right now. I got volume 2, because I have not seen any of the episodes on it.

And bananas are my friiiiends! **hugs a banana.** Zoe sent me a random facts thing once and it said that bananas help with cramping. **glomps Zoe!** I tried bananas over the weekend since it's my time of the month and I have not had cramping! ^_________^